It's My Fault
by GreatDarkNoodleKing
Summary: Basically just the story told through my random Zanley additions. You don't like? Don't read. Simple as that... It's Zero's fault that Stanley's here- he has to protect him, right?
1. Chapter 1

**Third time trying to write this. Oiy, exhausting…**

**It's My Fault—Chapter One. (Warning, Slash/Yaoi. Don't read if you don't approve. Or if you're a hater on equality.)**

When a pair of shoes fell from the sky and hit my head, well, I thought it was too wild to be real. Especially when I found out those shoes were the shoes of Sweetfeet, my favorite baseball player. It seemed too Willy-Wonka-Golden-Ticket-Esque to really be real. It was like some fantasy story. Well, I was right about one thing- it was too good to be true. Cops thought I had stolen them, trying to explain that they fell from the sky would have been pointless, as it sounded crazy even to me- and it happened to me! See, all my life, everything has gone wrong for me, and nothing ever goes my way, so I just learned to stop fighting with life. My grandfather said it was because of a curse, and sometimes I really did believe it. Because nobody on earth had luck as bad as mine, besides me anyway…

Even in school I was unlucky, in social status, in grades, and in love life. Girls didn't like me, and sometimes I wasn't sure if I liked girls back. They had always been so horrible to me; it wouldn't surprise me at all if I actually liked boys. Maybe if I met a decent girl who treated me like a human being, then maybe… But so far, no. Then again, no boys at my school treated me decently either, so maybe I was just a lonely little isotope with no partner in the giant universe to love.

I had been arrested and the judge had told me it would take at least a month for my trial to start, because we apparently needed word from Clyde Livingston, aka Sweetfeet, about the whole situation. He told me, basically, that he hated my guts and never wanted to be associated with me. One more thing to chock up as part of the family curse, I suppose. I got the choice of going to jail or to Camp… Green Lake… I chose the camp, assuming it was like a normal Summer camp. Nope!

More curse magic, this camp turned out to be one huge desert pit in the middle of nowhere. Just my luck… And at this camp, we apparently had to dig holes all day long to learn our lessons for whatever crimes we had committed. I was walked into a room, introduced to a Mr. Sir, whose name I found amusingly redundant, and then Mr. Sir took me to a room to change clothes.

"You get two sets of clothes," he explained to me, chewing on sunflower seeds, "After three days your work clothes are washed and your second set becomes your work clothes."

After getting dressed, a short man, shorter than me astonishingly, came in and called my name, leaving out the end of 'the fourth'. Mr. Sir hadn't been too impressed with that story… The short man said that just because I had done bad things didn't make me a bad kid. To be honest, I just found the sound of his voice to be really annoyingly high pitched, so I wasn't sure I wanted to hear any more. He said he respected me, and for some reason the statement made me feel queasy.

Mr. Sir seemed to agree with me, because he said if he started that 'touchy feely crap' he was out. I'd be right there with him! But the short man, called Pendanski, said he was going to show me around.

He pointed out the showers, the wreck room, the mess hall, and he told me I'd be in D-Tent. "D stands for diligence," he said proudly. To me, it just sounded like motivational speech crap. A group of boys approached us and to my surprise, one called Pendanski mom.

"Who's the Neanderthal?" the boy asked, a dark brown skinned boy wearing glasses so dusty they looked like cheap plastic.

"This is Stanley," he introduced me, saying who the boys were, but then they confused me by telling me they had other names. One told me Pendanski was mom.

"They all have their little nicknames, but I prefer to use the names their parents gave them," he said, receiving three pairs of eye rolls from the boys, "the names society will recognize them by." The end almost sounded like a question.

Pendanski took me to my tent and 'Armpit' or was it Theodore…? Told me that a cot with a large dark stain was where Barf-bag slept and patted it almost triumphantly. I assumed this was my bed, seeing as all the others were currently taken. Pendanski was telling me things and stuff, but I was too disgusted by the stain on the bed to really listen. I had to sleep on dried puke. Gross! Thank you family curse, thank you…

Pendanski introduced the boys, who quickly told me that they were named otherwise, and I just tried to resist scratching my head. I had said hi softly, hoping that maybe at least one of the boys here would be kind to me. But judging from the wide-eyed, soul eating stare of a boy with crazy blond hair, that didn't seem likely. Apparently he was… Ricky… No, wait, Armpit… Theodore…? Said he was called Zig Zag… I was so confused at this point, I was just going to try Pendanski's names for now, they seemed real…

Pendanski drew my attention from the frightening, unblinking, Ricky and said, "And this is Zero. Say hello to Stanley, Zero." Zero, a small boy with caramel brown skin, lay on his cot and didn't even blink at the mention of his nickname, or was it his name? Pendanski used Zero; maybe he really was called that… He said he used their real names… Zero, huh? Odd name… "You wanna know why they call 'im Zero?" Pendanski asked with a malicious grin. Okay… So maybe Zero _was_ a nickname… "'Cause there's nothin' goin' on in his stupid little head!" the man said, ruffling the small boys' springy dark brown afro of falling curly tresses in a way that almost seemed threatening and dominant. It made me a little tense. But Zero didn't even blink; he just lay there in silence.

I heard Ricky ask something and I reluctantly looked away from the little kid on his bed. He was easier to look at than Ricky, whose eyes reminded me of a crack addict I had seen on the side of the road two years ago. I didn't want to look at that. After a little more conversation from the boys in my tent, I looked back at Zero. He didn't look at me; he just turned over on his side, facing away from me. I furrowed my brow in question as I thought I heard him sigh. Maybe he thought the conversation the boys were having was stupid, it wasn't exactly intelligent, so I couldn't really blame him.

It was time for dinner, and I found that the food was disgusting as on television. The loud speaker said dinner was string beans, refried beans, garbanzo beans, some other type of beans, and banana Jell-O. I didn't even want to ask why banana Jell-O was put on that list.

"Hey, new kid, c'mere, you sit here," Ricky told me, moving down a seat and letting me set my tray onto the table before me. I glanced around nervously, yet hopefully, at the boys. Squid, as I now had learned to call the boys by their nicknames and not their real names, was chewing on a toothpick and squinting at me. Armpit was eating, ignoring my presence entirely. Zero looked at me when I first got there, and then he went back to his food. X-Ray began saying something to me, and it took me a second to register that he wasn't just talking, he was taking.

He took my bread, and said, "So you wouldn't mind giving it to somebody who did, now wouldja?" He was implying to someone who dug, because I hadn't.

I didn't fight him. I didn't want trouble; I wanted someone to be my friend for once in my life. Who knows? Maybe I'd get lucky if I tried to be the good guy in a juvenile delinquent camp. "No, you can have it," I muttered, twiddling my fingers nervously.

After a brief moment of silence, he asked what 'they' got me for. I couldn't tell the actual truth, I simply said what the cops believed, "Stealing a pair of shoes…" I whispered it in a meek and worried voice.

They laughed at me and teased about how they were still on someone's feet. Then Ricky asked with a demented chuckle, "No, you jus' killed the guy first. You just left out that little detail, first, right?"

I muttered in response, "They were Clyde Livingston's…" All the boys looked at me with wide eyes, but they quickly put me off, saying that I couldn't have and commenting on Sweetfeet.

Magnet, beside me, asked, silencing the others, "How'd you get 'em? He's like the fastest guy in the majors, right?"

So I figured I may as well try and explain. "Well, he-he donated hi-his shoes. To this- this homeless shelter. And—"

I was cut off by a sudden, higher, soft voice asking, "Did they have red X's on 'em?"

Everyone at the table gasped and leaned backwards, showing who it was that had spoken. Zero… I stared at the little kid for a second before Squid attracted my attention.

"You got Zero to talk!" he exclaimed.

"'Ey, what else can you do, Zero?" Armpit asked across the table.

Zero only glanced at the two boys, and he returned his gaze to me. In the darkened light of the mess hall, I saw that he had dark chocolate brown eyes. And they were waiting for an answer.

"Yeah," I breathed, nodding my head slightly, "Yeah they did…"

He swallowed, blinking at me, and he quickly looked back to his food, twirling his fork into his food. The rest of the meal was spent in awkward silence. And afterwards we all went back to our tent, where I had the worst lack of sleep of my life.

…**.Originally this was going to be from Zero's perspective, but I failed at it twice, so I gave up and chose Stanley as my victim- oh, I mean, subject. Just a slip of the tongue there… Well… No… I'm typing… How does that work…?**


	2. Chapter 2

**More random Holes story…**

**It's My Fault—Chapter Two. **

The morning had been dreary and groggy for me, apparently I had grabbed X-Ray's shovel and he hadn't liked that. Whatever, how was I supposed to know it was his? While we walked out to our dig site, I noticed Zero got pretty far ahead of the rest of the group. He had his shovel, which I thought was just as tall as he was, slung over his shoulders with his arms nonchalantly hanging over the wooden shaft. He may have been the smallest boy of the tent, but he sure didn't walk in small strides.

Mr. Sir told me where to dig and I tried my best to start. It was difficult for me; we lived in an apartment back home, so I had never really used a shovel before. It was exhilarating at first, but soon enough I began to develop awful blisters on my hands. And then the rest of the dig was misery.

After several long hours in the hot sun, Mr. Sir's truck came back and everyone climbed out of their holes. Magnet came to help me out of my hole- maybe I had actually made a friend. He said encouragingly when he saw my hands, bloody and raw, "First hole's the hardest, right?"

I got to the back of the quickly forming line and was happy to see that this was for re-filling canteens. I stood behind Zero and I looked down at the camouflage cap he wore over his curly tresses. It was faded with the sunlight that had evidently beaten down on it, but it was still obviously camouflage. I had my red baseball cap, and I noticed that pretty much each of the other boys had some form of head protection of their own. I liked mine and Zero's best, though- kerchiefs and such wrapped around their heads reminded me of bikers.

I took a big swig of my water once I got it, grateful for the cold relief to my dry throat. Amazing how one can take something for granted for so long until they needed to ration it off. I looked at the other boys and my eyes naturally fell to Zero and his hole. The deepest so far- I was actually pretty surprised.

Not long after, Zero climbed out of his hole and spat in it. The spitting had made me look up first. "You're done already?" I asked in utter disbelief. The littlest member of D-Tent and he was first finished with his hole!

"Yeah, doncha know man?" the boys began saying, "He's like the fastest digger in the camp!" Magnet had said that. And then another boy, I think it was Zig Zag, said, "He's a mole! I think he eats the dirt!" I was staring after the little boy, watching his hair bounce under his cap- envious of how easily he had managed to dig his hole.

"Moles don't eat dirt," X-Ray commented, "Worms eat dirt, yo…"

I gazed after the quickly disappearing image of Zero- even after he became just an orange speck on the horizon. I was so jealous of how fast he had finished- Mr. Sir had said the longer it took to dig your hole, the longer you had to be out in the sun. For Zero, that was only a few hours. For me, it would be much longer.

The sun was starting to set when I finally finished, and I couldn't get out. I cried for somebody to help me climb free, but I knew very well I was the only one still out there. So I had to scramble out of my hole and go back to the camp. I took a shower and changed clothes. When I started to leave and head back to my tent, I heard the cock of a gun and Mr. Sir hiss, "Don't move."

I squeaked and swallowed and dropped my stuff, holding my hands up in surrender. He shot; I flinched, but felt no pain. Slowly turning behind me, I was horrified to see one of the infamous yellow spotted lizards. And then it ran at me. I ran to Mr. Sir as he shot the creature's head clear off when it jumped at me. He told me to get my stuff. I was cautious in grabbing the clothes and then I stood next to him, shivering in terror.

"Getchurself a good sleep son," he told me. I nodded, walked slowly, glanced back, and then ran back to the tent, wheezing out a horrified 'oh my God!'.

Zig Zag was the first to approach me. "What color was its blood?" was all he asked, not 'are you okay?' or 'I can't believe you got away!'… I told him in a stutter that I couldn't tell, and then the jerk had the gall to scare me by shouting in my face with no warning. I flinched and the boys all laughed at my body's natural reaction to surprise.

I sat on my cot, my knees shaking and my hands feeling cold and clammy. Armpit said it was the lizards we were working for, and I dared to look over at Zero, who I had not heard laugh. Zero was already looking at me, and with his head propped up on his arm, he shook it from side to side, making his curls sway and bounce. I was fascinated by his hair- for some reason I really liked it. It was so much curlier than my own, but it still fell around his face in curtains like normal straight hair would.

I figured the shaking of his head meant that I shouldn't listen to the boys because they were just trying to scare me. It was a little comforting to know that Zero was telling me not to let them get to me- at least one person here didn't gang up on me once they were surrounded by the others. Magnet had proven to back out of being kind when the others were around.

A sudden gunshot startled everyone out of their teasing and laughing and I swallowed nervously. I pulled up my blankets and tried to get to sleep. When the morning music played, I had sat up in absolute terror for the first few seconds- my whole night had been plagued by nightmares of yellow spotted lizards killing me and none of the boys coming to help me.

This morning I was in the wreck room, writing the last bit of what I needed to on my letter to my mom. I didn't want her to worry, so I was lying about how great the camp was and how wonderful the boys were. When I had just finished writing on the front, Squid snatched it out of my hands and asked me who I was writing to.

"Aw, you miss your mommy and daddy?" he teased me. He put out an arm and stopped me from getting it back. I tried to get it back, struggling and telling him to just give it to me. I hadn't noticed the small boy with the bouncy nearly black curls leave the pool table at the start of our fight and stand not far off, clutching a cue tightly in his small caramel hands, and glaring daggers at the boy assaulting me. Squid gripped my orange jumpsuit and said, "Believe me, they're glad to be rid'a you…!" And he threw my letter in the trash. I bent forward, picked it up out of the empty bin and went and straightened it against the mailbox. After it was decent enough, I placed it to my lips, kissing the letter that was my only connection to anyone who actually cared about me with love, and I slipped it into the wooden box.

I left the wreck room after that, and the small boy who had been keeping an eye on me slowly went back to the pool table.

Digging today, yet again… Pendanski was in charge of giving us water at the canteen refill time. He refilled Zero's in front of me, and I noticed that he sort of slammed it into his chest. It made me a little confused, but when I saw Zero glaring at him, I figured they weren't so buddy buddy after all. I showed Pendanski a fossil I had found today and asked if I could get the day off, since that was what Mr. Sir said. I got it handed back to me roughly, and then the boys inspected my find. Armpit had cooed over the 'little fishies' and I quickly learned he wasn't as mean as he pretended to be. But he quickly covered it up.

One of the boys said I belonged in a cave. I didn't really care, but it was a little upsetting to know I would have to spend another day without real dinner. After I had finished, I was so tired I just wanted to go and sleep. But I went into the wreck room, deciding I could do something there to help me chill. I was shoved by boys playing table soccer, or whatever it was called, and I was knocked into a boy sitting on a chair. He shoved me and said, "Hey watch it!"

I said without thinking, "You watch it man…"

He growled, "Whadyou say t'me?" and he kicked me into the ground. Now I may be a tall boy, but I'm not physically skilled in the least. And a fight with this huge kid was the last thing I wanted. I got up, attempted to anyway, and mumbled about how I was sorry, but I forgot in that single moment that the stools moved. I spun his radio onto the ground and fell into the boy again. He shoved me, jumping to his feet and said I was in for it, grabbing my jumpsuit like Squid had.

The other boys immediately jumped to my rescue. Zero, I hadn't seen, had grabbed a pool ball and had lurched forward when X-Ray broke up our fight and told the big guy to chill. The kid shouted to keep 'that punk' away from him, and the boys from D-Tent gathered with me around the pool table.

"Hey, don' nobody mess with the caveman, a'i'ght?" X-Ray, I think… Or was it Magnet…? Had said.

I know it was X-Ray this time when he said, "Man, did you see Caveman back there?"

"No, no, I don't wanna mess with anybody!" I quickly said. Then a whistle sounded and suddenly boys were slapping my back, patting my arm, and telling me to come on, or asking me if I was coming. But they called me Caveman. Caveman! Was Caveman me?

I looked to Zero, who for some reason was walking slowly beside me, almost not even walking. He was already looking at me and I asked, "So… Am I Caveman…?"

He shrugged his shoulders, his hands in his pockets, and he said, "S' better than Barf-bag..." I smiled with a slight bit of pride and Zero started walking away with the other boys from our tent.

Pendanski was asking us about what we liked and what we liked to do. He seemed angry with me for having a nickname, but he then asked coldly, "You're here on account of one person, know who that person is?"

I decided to be a smart ass in front of my new, well, friends…! "Yeah," I said seriously, I saw Zero look at me, and then I said, "My no good, dirty rotten, pig stealin' great great grandfather, that's who it is…!" All but Zero and Pendanski laughed at that one. Everyone else found it incredibly amusing.

"You get one life, and so far you've done a pretty good job of screwing it up," Pendanski said after telling me that it was my fault I was here. Then he struck a blow that shocked even me into silence. After saying we'd be surprised what we could accomplish once we set our minds to it, he looked right at Zero. "Even Zero here isn't completely useless!" he said, almost sounding amused. I stared at him in shock- what kind of counselor treats a kid like this? No wonder Zero hated him so much! I looked at Zero as Pendanski continued by asking, "What about you, Zero? Whaddyou like to do?"

No response. Zero didn't even look up from the floor. I admired him will and his backbone- I knew I wouldn't be able to stay as strong as he was during this interrogation.

"You jus' won't talk with me, will you?" Pendanski asked angrily.

Armpit commented with a giggle, "Yo, man, he only talks to Caveman, you know?"

"You think you're better than all this?" Pendanski asked. I looked at him again, because I could taste the malice and hate in his voice, then I looked back to Zero. Zero slowly lifted his eyes to glare at the counselor with a gaze that could chill even death. He looked to me, to my slight surprise. Maybe he was trying to prove to Pendanski that he only talked to me, so looking at me made it seem like he was talking to me. But he waited, just looking at me. I nodded in Pendanski's direction, giving him unnecessary permission to speak to the man he obviously hated. It almost made me feel like I was important, having Zero ask for my permission like that. It made me feel appreciated and it warmed my heart- not to mention my cheeks, I knew I was blushing from the sentimental values of the simple event.

Zero's voice was so cold and so spiteful and so full of venom- so very different from how he spoke to me- that I almost didn't believe it came from him. He hissed out four simple words that cut through the air like a switchblade knife, "I like diggin' holes."

I smiled at what he said, but what Pendanski said in response made my smile fade. "Then you're in the right place for it. **Buddy boy**." I turned to stare at the older man, my eyes burning with a hatred I hadn't known I had until just now. Why the hell was he treating Zero like this? Zero treated him a hell of a lot better than most of the boys in this room did- why was he being such a prick?

After our little therapy session, I went out to the showers, in the hopes of getting some time to myself. Of course, I had gone to my cot to get my token first, and then I went to shower. I hopped right up and took off all my clothes, pushing the token into the slot and letting the icy water cascade over me. I hadn't even looked to see if I was alone, I just needed to wash off all the tension of that awful talk. Zero hadn't deserved such crap. Who the hell did Pendanski think he was?

The water ran down my body, I wasn't really planning on rinsing my hair or anything, I just needed to feel the cold liquid wash away all the exterior sweat and dust and stress of the day. Cold water can work wonders… I leaned my head back and let the ice rivulets pound my atom's apple and then my collar bone, and then the top of my chest, while the results of the water ran down my arms and back and legs and into the drain. I let out a sigh of contentment and smiled blissfully until the water shut off.


	3. Chapter 3

**Wooh…! I have no idea what I'm doing! *dances***

**It's My Fault- Chapter Three.**

After my wonderfully cold shower, I started going back to the tent to get some sleep. I didn't have my orange suit on anymore, I was just going to bed, why put it back on? No, I was wearing a white T-shirt and my black and grey plaid boxers. About halfway to the tent I ran into Zero. I smiled when I saw him and I said, "Hey man, I thought it was really cool how you stood up to Pendanski like that…"

Zero blinked when I had said that, and he mumbled, "Wha…?"

"Well," I explained, feeling shy for some weird reason, "even when he was obviously being a jerk to you for no reason, you didn't let him win. I just thought that was really cool. If I had been you, I'd probably have been screaming at him. You're a really strong kid…"

In response, Zero scratched the back of his head and his cheeks darkened into a blush- I guess I had really had flattered him. He muttered with a small smile, "Um… Thanks, man…" And I patted him on the back before we both walked back to the tent. The boys looked at us when we came back in, but none of them said anything. Zig Zag was grinning at me with frozen wide eyes, probably planning another way to scare me out of my skin, I was sure.

I sat on my cot and set my clothes beside it, running my fingers through my still damp hair. I felt a few droplets fall onto my shoulders through the white fabric, but the cold was always welcome in this godforsaken camp. Armpit had asked me if I had seen anymore lizards tonight, I knew he was teasing me a little bit, but at least I was still being called Caveman, so I knew I had a little respect from them now. I told him that I hadn't, but I was sure Mr. Sir had. The boys laughed a little at that, and then I rested myself on my bed, staring up at the top of the tent.

When I woke up the next morning, I knew it was time to dig. Groaning unhappily, I got up and put on my work clothes. To be honest, I couldn't tell which was which anymore… They were both dusty, and I had yet to see any of the clothes get washed. Maybe that had all been a lie…

Digging out in the sun today, I occasionally would look at the other boys and their holes, jealousy flaring up within me every time I looked at Zero's. At one point I heard someone say something about a cloud. I looked up, and sure enough, there was a little cloud not far off.

"C'mon little cloud, you can do it," Magnet said tiredly from his hole.

Armpit said he was only asking for a little shade, and as I heaved a large white rock that was strikingly shaped like a head with a turban or something wrapped around the top, I grumbled, "Man, the Warden owns the shade…!"

I set the rock down and then went to go back to digging. I froze when the tiniest glimmer of something golden caught my eye. I let my shovel rest against the side of my hole and I bent to observe my find. It was thin, gold, and the tip was rounded.

I heard Magnet ask what I had, and I put out a hand, telling him to wait. "I dunno," I whispered, looking it over. I remembered the threat X-Ray ad given me yesterday, so I decided to call him over. He hopped out of his hole with ease- he had springy legs. And soon enough almost all the other boys had gathered around my hole.

X-Ray eventually took it, and I was stupid enough to tell him to give it to Pendanski the next day. The canteen routine had already been thrown off by X-Ray. Oh yeah, that had been really confusing when it had happened. X-Ray had left his place in line to shove Zero back to the end of the line and tell me that I went there now. I stared at him as he walked away for a second, before I looked at Zero. Zero had been looking up at me and I could tell he was upset. He looked hurt beyond belief- I understood almost immediately. Even though he had been here longer than I had, and he was definitely more worthy of a spot in front of the line with his digging speed, X-Ray had basically said he valued me more than Zero. He basically said that Zero was less important, and I think he knew it. While I had looked at him, I was so sorry for him that I actually didn't move, hoping he would just head back up to his spot in line. His eyes searched mine, and I motioned a little to try and tell him to go ahead, but he looked down at the ground, biting his lip instead. Maybe I should have said something at that point- he talked to me, and he listened to me when I talked, so maybe he would have moved if I had worded my feelings about how he should have stayed in front.

I was so caught up in how X-Ray had caused Zero to seem so sad that I hardly noticed when the small boy finished his hole. I looked up as he trudged back to camp and I sighed softly to myself, piercing the dried earth with my shovel again and threw another large pile up over the edge of my hole.

When I went back to the tent after I had finished digging, I was really happy to find my mom had written back to me. As I read, it sounded like she had believed my lies about the camp- how she hadn't seen how dusty and gross the letter was, I didn't know… But I decided that I didn't want Squid patronizing me again, so I went from the wreck room with my letter to read it in privacy in the tent. Or at least, it started as privacy… About halfway through my reading of the letter, I heard a soft thud and I turned my head to find Zero was there. I swallowed and went back to my letter, enjoying reading what my mom had said.

I laughed at her last sentence and envisioned my mom standing inside a shoe, waving her hand in front of her nose. That thought made me laugh again, and suddenly I heard a familiarly soft voice beside me ask me what I was laughing at.

Glancing up at him, I cleared my throat as I explained it to Zero. "Oh, it's just somethin' my mom wrote. She-she uh…" I cleared my throat again, and continued, "She says 'I feel sorry for the little old lady who lived in the shoe, because it must've smelled really bad…" I looked up at Zero, who was staring down at me with such a confused look that I wondered if he had even heard me. "You know, like the nursery rhyme?" I tried harder to get something from the quiet boy.

Zero just stared at me, his brown eyes trying to comprehend something that escaped me completely. I looked back at my letter, and for some reason I knew he was looking at it too. It was uncomfortable and I quickly said, "Uh, I-I fell really awkward with you reading over my shoulder like that-so…"

And then he dropped a bombshell on me. "I can't read…" he said gently, shaking his head back and forth, sending a wave through his curly hair. I swallowed and blinked up at him. I quickly looked away, trying not to think too much on it. How was anyone supposed to respond to that?

If I had thought that where he was ending it, I was wrong, because Zero's quiet voice asked, "Can you teach me?" I swallowed again. Wasn't it hard enough to dig all day long? I was the slowest digger in the entire camp- did he really expect me to have energy after all that time?

I looked at him for a second, muttering, "I um..." seeing the look in his eyes almost willed me to say yes. He looked desperate and it hurt me to say no to him. "I'm not really… uh… a good teacher…" I said, not looking at him now. I was glad I didn't, because even as all I had said was that his face had fallen. "And uh… I get tired… From diggin' all day, so… Jus' wanna come back and chill, you know…?" I had stood up now and was trying to make this as easy as possible. He scratched his head absently, but I could see he looked upset. I tried to pat him on the shoulder in a friendly way to end on a good note, but he didn't even react. He was just staring at where I had previously been sitting.

I left, hoping I hadn't just killed all his hopes and dreams, and I tried to cheer myself up by watching Armpit dance and mocking him with the others for his odor. It worked a bit, but I still felt bad for telling Zero I wasn't going to teach him to read. Now that I thought about it, it really wasn't that big of a deal… I probably could have managed it if I had applied myself. Now I felt like an ass for saying no.

The next time we went digging, Pendanski was in charge of giving us water. X-Ray had only just gotten his water when he called for him to come see what he had found. Pendanski called 'Lou' the Warden and I knew everyone was just as nervous as I was. Resting my hands on my head as the warden was called; I had to repress a groan. It should have been me who was even getting a chance of a day off.

We each got our water; I took a swig before even really leaving the truck. I heard the swishing thud of Pendanski slamming Zero's canteen into the little guy's chest, and I actually turned my head to scowl at Pendanski. He noticed, to my surprise, and merely scowled back. So, at least he knew that I knew he was treating Zero badly. One more person to help back the little guy up. Well, actually, I was probably the only person willing to stick up for him. I felt a wave of pity as I watched Zero return to the solitude of digging his hole. Maybe that was why he was reaching out to me and only to me- he figured I was the best chance he had to have someone there for him. I seemed like as much of an outcast as he did, right? Now, once again, I felt like a… well a dick for telling him I wasn't going to teach him. Zero was coming to me for comfort and friendship, and I had only just now figured it out.

I slowly went back to my hole and dug for a while, until a sharp white car drove up around to where we were. I looked up, just like everyone else, and I was surprised when I saw a woman with long red hair step out of the car and walk over to Pendanski. The warden was a girl! Nobody had told me that!

I leaned back in my hole, watching her strut over to X-Ray's hole, and I smiled a little to myself. She was definitely a nice sight after having only been able to stare at the dirty disgusting boys in the camp. She was clean, trim, and not wearing bright orange. Huh… Maybe I didn't like boys…? I noticed all the other boys around me were staring at her as well, and at least I knew I wasn't the only one who was gawping.

Unbeknownst to me, Zero had looked at her once, rolled his eyes, and went back to digging. I only knew someone was still digging because I could hear the shovel every time it pierced the earth.

Double shower tokens and a snack! I wanted to murder X-Ray right now! I should be getting those rewards! It should have been me! It was upsetting. But then I heard the warden say we would be getting our canteens filled and I felt a little better.

"I already filled them," Pendanski said with a smile. She turned on him so fast, I thought she was a rattler ready to strike.

"Excuse me?" she hissed. Soon enough Pendanski was obviously losing this argument. I literally felt my spine go rigid when I heard her call out my nickname. I had no idea how she knew it, but I scrambled out of my hole to stand in front of her.

She asked if by any chance I might have taken a drink since my canteen was last filled. I didn't want to seem greedy, so I had told her I was fine. She turned on me after that, so I said I might have. She thanked me and basically spat at Pendanski about how he was stupid and ordered him to refill my canteen.

Okay… So maybe I only thought she was pretty… The warden seemed too scary for anyone to ever want to get any closer to her than arm's length. I knew I wouldn't let myself say something she could use against me anywhere near her from now on.

"Zero!" she shouted, startling me out of my thoughts, "You take over X-Ray's hole! Caveman will assist you!" I hurried back to X-Ray's hole and hopped in with Zero, who glanced at me over his shoulder before quickly upending more dirt out of it. For some reason I felt like Zero was refusing to acknowledge me- probably angry about the whole not teaching thing. I felt badly enough; he didn't have to make me feel worse!

At one point we each had to try and make the hole wider, because the warden told us we needed to, and I turned first. My back was against Zero's and it felt really uncomfortable- we were both gross and sweaty, and we were each throwing dirt around, getting dust on ourselves. When our backs first hit each other's it felt like Zero tried to move away, but even I knew that he knew there wasn't enough room for that yet. I muttered to him, feeling my shoulder blades rub against his, "Sorry," before throwing a shovelful of dirt out of the hole. It hurt to have our backs continuously hitting each other, neither one of us was fat, so there was no cushioning as our bones repeatedly hit each other. I almost wished Armpit was in here instead, but then there would have been even less room…

Thinking on it, I guess I could settle to have Zero's shoulders and elbows poking into me occasionally easier than to settle for Armpit's stink. At least with Zero in here he didn't smell any worse than I did… I think… Smell had kind of eluded me whenever we were out on the lakebed. It was hard to tell if you smelled like dirt and sweat when that was all you were surrounded with.

Finally there was room in the hole- I pulled my back away from Zero's, but to my shock he fell backwards, toppling into me. Apparently he had been using me as a support and I hadn't even noticed- the kid didn't exactly weigh that much. I caught him, stopping his head from slamming into the shaft of my shovel, and helped him stand back up. I apologized for not letting him know I was moving, but he didn't say anything. He looked embarrassed; his whole face was redder than usual. I smiled gently at him, saying that there was nothing to be embarrassed about without actually speaking, and I went back to digging.

Once there was enough room for others to join us in the hole, others did. Squid and Magnet first. The others were apparently trying to connect all the holes together. As we dug, I muttered to the three boys sharing the hole with me, "You sure we're diggin' to build character?"

Magnet laughed, Squid scoffed, and Zero just looked at me. At least I got reactions out of all three of them. I had hoped to relieve some of the tension of being shoved into a hole with three other boys. It had been obvious Squid hadn't wanted to join us, but with the warden giving orders, no one was going to say no. After a few more minutes, a hole was broken through or hole and I saw Zig Zag smiling through it. He was still as frightening to look at as ever…

That night was a wonderfully tiring one. Nobody but X-Ray had any energy, and that was only because he hadn't dug. When we got back, I thought about showering, but it took me a while to finally decide on doing so. The water was cold, as it always was, but I liked the cold by now. After I had finished my shower, I had decided to go to the wreck room one last time before bed. As I went, I suddenly felt a jerk in one direction, and I was dragged to the side on the mess hall.

Squid was standing in front of me, and he hissed at me, "Okay, what gives?"

I stared at him in confusion and I went, "Wha…?"

He groaned and shoved me into the wall further and hissed lowly, "You today, ya little jackass…! Are you trying to make Zero angry or somethin'?"

I tilted my head to the right a little and muttered, "I don't follow…"

Loosening his grip on me, Squid said softly, "When the Warden called you up, Zero looked ready to stab you. Did you promise him something, or what?"

"I…" I started, but stopped. Zero looked angry? Well, that made sense… I had denied him the one thing I knew he really wanted to know-reading…

Squid spat at me, "Come to think of it, he's been actin weird around you a lot lately…" I blinked and looked at him.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, "He's only been mad at me recently…!"

"So he _is_ mad at you," Squid whispered. I tried to say something else, but he stopped me. "That doesn't exactly explain why he follows you, though…" He didn't seem to be talking to me anymore, just thinking out loud.

"He follows me around…?" I asked, my eyes wide with surprise and confusion.

Squid looked back at me and said, "Everywhere. Haven't you noticed…?"

"No," I replied honestly, "No, I haven't…" Squid frowned, but nodded his head twice, let me go and walked back to the tent. I stepped out of the tiny alleyway of sorts and brushed myself off. My back felt like it was covered in cobwebs, so I spent a longer amount of time slapping at the fabric of my clothes covering my back. Or at least, the parts of my back I could reach.

I reached my hand up to run my fingers through my hair, hoping I didn't have crap there, when something in my peripheral vision caught my eye. I continued the motion of running my fingers through my hair, so as not to give myself away, but I looked as far left as I could to see what had gotten my attention. Zero. Standing down a ways, just watching me… Squid walked past him, I must have noticed the movement first- the human eye catches all movement, after all…

I smiled weakly at Zero, lifting my hand to let him know that I saw him, and I walked to the wreck room. I always had paper in my pockets nowadays, and I sat in the wreck room, which was basically empty, and I began writing more to my mom.

"I think I might have made a real best friend for the first time," I wrote with a little smile, "He's a good kid. I think you'd like him…" I heard soft thuds that signified footsteps, and I glanced up. Zero walked by me, looking right at me as he did. I swallowed as my brain began processing everything Squid had said. Now that I thought of it, Zero really was everywhere I was. Even when I hadn't thought it significant, Zero had been there… It was actually really unnerving to think that he was following me and I didn't know why. Was he like Ricky and silently plotting my demise? My flesh trembled at the thought. Maybe my letter to mom could wait…

I crumpled it back up and tossed it into the trash. I didn't think it would be wise to leave immediately after Zero arrived, because then he would be suspicious, and he might figure out that I was onto him. I hoped Zero wasn't planning to kill me; he had seemed like such a good kid… Of course, now that I had told him I couldn't teach him to read, it wouldn't exactly surprise me if he was planning to kill me.

After sitting and humming my family song to myself for a long while, I figured I may as well head to the tent. I stood up and when I heard another similar creak across the room, I felt my spine stiffen as I knew it was Zero.

I walked back to the tent, and not far behind me I could hear another pair of footsteps crunching on the ground. When I went to sleep that night, I was basically praying that I would wake up the next morning with all my limbs intact.


	4. Chapter 4

**More of this…**

**It's My Fault- Chapter Four.**

I was so happy to wake up without a scratch on me the next morning. We all went back out to continue the excavation of this enormous hole, and all of D-Tent was assigned to digging. Armpit at one point had said he thought he found something- he'd lost a week of shower privileges for that. More punishment for the rest of us than for him, really…

At one point while I was digging I noticed someone come up next to me- Zero. I smiled nervously at him, and he just looked back at me. Yep. Definitely still mad… I should just say yes to his stupid reading request- this was killing me! As I dug next to Zero, I couldn't help but feeling a little pathetic. He was so much better at this than I was! I wished I had half of his digging speed; even that would have been appreciated.

As I dug, I sang my song softly to myself, "If only if only, the woodpecker sighs… The bark on the tree was as soft as the skies… As the wolf waits below, hungry and lonely… He cries to the moon, if only if only…" Zero had paused in his digging to listen to me and suddenly I felt self-conscious. I hoped he was the only one who had heard… The guys would never let singing just slide by.

The digging like this went on all day long, my arms felt like pudding by the half-way canteen filling point, and I knew this wasn't going to be enjoyable for me. There were so many kids getting water, I just went straight to the back of the line to wait for water. Zero was a little ways ahead of me in the line, and X-Ray was in front. I smiled to see Zero ahead of me- that was where he deserved to be. He was a much more valuable digger than I was. If we lost him in this excavation to an injury, there would be no hope for the rest of us to survive! He was worth a hell of a lot more than I was…!

I wasn't really thinking about anything around me anymore, I was too busy imagining the hell we'd all be put through if we didn't have Zero to cover our backs. When he looked back at me, I didn't see, and when he came to the back of the line with me, I didn't think anything of it.

"What was that song you were singin' earlier?" the unexpected question startled me out of my thoughts, and I turned to find Zero was now standing behind me, looking up at me expectantly. I swallowed back a surprised shriek when I saw him there.

I replied with a slight stammer, "I uh… J-just a song my great-great grandfather taught his son… And then he taught his son and then my dad taught it to me…" I probably didn't need to go into that explanation, but I just had to explain it a little more. Zero squinted up at me as I told him, and he licked his lips absently when I had finished.

I felt really weird with Zero back behind me again. I voiced that opinion. "Why'd you come to the back of the line? You could have gotten water sooner," I said to him.

He shrugged and said, "I'm used to standing behind you… Besides, everyone else needs water just as bad as I do…"

I quickly argued, "Oh no, you _definitely_ deserve water sooner than half of these guys here…! You're the fastest digger in camp! You should get water before anyone else…!" His face had lit up when I had started that argument; he looked overjoyed to hear me saying something so kind to him. It made sense- nobody else ever said anything half as nice as that to him. I thought for a moment, and even though he wasn't smiling, this was the first real time I had seen Zero look genuinely happy.

When I got my water, it got a little over halfway full before the dripping signified to me that the tank had run out. Pendanski handed my canteen to me and smirked at Zero. "Maybe you shouldn't leave your place in line, next time," he remarked snidely.

I frowned at him and turned to the smallest member of camp. "Here, Zero," I took his canteen and undid the lid, pouring half of my water into his plastic container. Zero had frozen when I had taken hold of his canteen- if I had to guess, I would say he was grinning maliciously at Pendanski. I would be if I were him.

Once the water was even, I had actually put a larger amount into Zero's canteen; I handed it back to him and smiled at him. Zero smiled back, not fully, because I had yet to see a full smile from him, and took a gulp of the cold liquid. I hopped back to where my spot in the dig was, Zero quickly following, and I wondered if this would be like what happened with X-Ray. Would Zero pay me back for this…? Well, I guess he didn't have to. This probably didn't make up for not letting him read… Zero didn't have to pay me back- I still owed him…

It took hours more to keep digging before the warden finally decided they were finished. I climbed out of the hole with a little difficulty, and I immediately turned to help Zero- he was almost a foot shorter than I was, how would he get out of here? I held out my hand to him, he seemed surprised to find me offering, but he gladly took the help as I easily pulled him up and out- once again, Zero hardly weighed anything. I patted him on the back and we joined the crowd of boys heading back to the camp.

How could Zero be planning to kill me now? He was suddenly so happy with me, there was no way there was any bad blood between us right now. I was completely comfortable with him walking right by my side the entire way back to camp. I wasn't afraid of being killed.

_"If only if only, the woodpecker sighs…" I looked up a large red tree to find a bright orange woodpecker sitting on the branch of a tree. Its face was white, but the top of its head was red. And it sighed heavily, looking down at the world from the tree. The woodpecker looked familiar…_

_ "The bark on the tree was as soft as the skies…" The orange on the woodpecker was shook off as it flapped its wings, revealing the rest of its body to match the white of its face, and under the red on the top of its head, there were longer, swirling feathers of brown that dangled around its head. I stared at it with only one thought 'the woodpecker looks like me'…_

_ "As the wolf waits below, hungry and lonely…" My eyes fell upon a brown wolf. It was like a soft chocolate ice cream cone- the color of its fur, everywhere but the top of its head and down its neck. There it was so dark it was nearly black. And in those darker spots, the wolf's fur curled and bounced as it stared up at the woodpecker, licking its lips._

_ "He cries to the moon, if only if only…" The wolf howled lowly, reaching its claws up the trunk of the tree, desperately reaching for the woodpecker. I wasn't frightened by this wolf, for some reason this wolf felt incredibly familiar to me. The way the wolf reached for the woodpecker… It wasn't trying to eat it, for some reason I could feel it… The wolf whined and cried out to the woodpecker, and I heard it whimper to itself._

_ "If only, if only…"_

I sat up straight in my bed, startled by the morning music. I swallowed a lump in my throat down and I quickly put my hand to my forehead. That dream… It had all seemed so real…! And that wolf… It had seemed so familiar… It reminded me of someone, but I just couldn't put my finger on it… That is, until my eyes fell upon a familiar head of curly dark brown hair. The wolf's fur!

My hands twitched when the chocolate brown eyes landed on my hazel ones- Zero was the wolf. It was the only thing that made any sense… The similarity of how they looked couldn't just be coincidence. I swallowed, just staring back at Zero, not daring to blink and break the spell that had fallen over us. I wasn't letting the wolf escape my sight- not when I knew he was looking at me in turn.

Zero licked his lips and slowly got to his feet, neither one of us breaking the stare between us. I didn't know if Zero was confused as to why I was staring at him and he didn't want to look away until he understood why, or if he just decided he wanted to stare back at me. A funny feeling formed in the pit of my stomach as I stared into his eyes- it almost felt like I was going to be sick, but it wasn't that queasy… It was on the edge of stomach sickness and just unsettling stomach acid levels.

Finally X-Ray broke the trance and smacked my forehead, saying that I was still asleep. He thought I was just staring off into space, and therefore that apparently justifies slapping someone in the face. I didn't understand his logic… But at least he had made that feeling stop by causing pain to spike in my forehead instead.

Getting up, we all headed out to dig once more. Zero was near me at one point, and I turned to him and said, "Look, even if I'm at the back of the line again today, I want you to go ahead and get toward the front. I'll be okay with whatever I get, kay?" He looked at me funny, furrowing his brow and he looked like he was going to say something against my order, so I quickly said, "You deserve the water more. I'll ration mine better today, alright?" He closed his mouth and smiled a little bit before nodding once. I smiled to myself- as long as you complimented Zero on how deserving he was, he'd listen to everything you said. Maybe the guys should try that if they wanted Zero to talk to them- just be nice.

As we dug, I noticed that Zero kept flipping his hair out of his face- he didn't bring his hat. It was kinda cute because he was failing at keeping those curly locks out of his face. He was like a determined little kid.

I took off my baseball cap and pulled it onto his head, tugging those curls back out of his face. He froze, but quickly turned and stared at me. "You looked like your hair was annoying you," I said with a smile, being completely honest; it had definitely looked that way. Zero touched my hat and blushed a little before returning my smile and going back to digging.

Once it was canteen time, I saw Zero almost waiting for me; I just motioned to him to go ahead. I still had a small amount of water left in my canteen- I really had rationed it today, and I knew that even if I didn't get any water for the refill, I'd be okay. Zero nodded and went ahead into the line. I ended up at the back once again, but it wasn't so bad. When I got to the truck, I think I got about a cup more of water before it ran out. I didn't care- the new re-fresher, adding a bit more cold to my water was enough. I took a sip and happily let a few droplets run out of the corners of my mouth and down my neck. It wasn't very cold because I hadn't gotten much new water, but it was appreciated nonetheless.

I came back to where I was supposed to dig, and I noticed Zero looking at me with concern on his face. I smiled and lifted up my canteen, swishing the water inside and letting him know I was totally good. He nodded and returned to his digging. It was funny to me- sometimes Zero and I didn't even have to talk, we just understood each other. We definitely had a connection, I could tell- I had decided at that moment that Zero was my only real friend at the camp. Maybe Magnet was almost a friend and the rest of them were close acquaintances, but Zero was definitely my only true friend. I wondered if it was the same for him with me.

At one point I noticed Squid was watching me- I hoped he still wasn't on that whole 'Zero following me' thing. I was totally okay with the boy's company at this point. We had grown really close, so having him physically be close to me didn't bother me anymore. I smiled at Squid, who gave me a half smile in return and then returned to digging.

Was this the third day of digging this horrible maze? It felt like so much longer to me… The only thing really keeping me sane was humming my family's song to myself whenever my mind began fading. A couple of times I got weird looks from other boys when I did, but honestly, I didn't care anymore. I was so sick of digging where nothing would turn up. Several times I had contemplated just telling the warden that I had found the tube and we were digging in the wrong spot, but I knew she wouldn't be happy to hear that, considering she was getting angrier with every hour we didn't find anything…

When we all went back to camp, I knew tonight I needed a shower. I stopped in my tracks when I smelled Armpit, though, and I immediately handed him my shower token, telling him that he needed it. He didn't argue, he just went to the showers and began washing off. I went to the tent to lie on my cot and think. All the other boys were in the wreck room right now; even Zero wasn't in the tent! For the first time I actually had the whole place to myself to think..! I closed my eyes and sighed happily, singing my song to myself as I bobbed my head against my pillow.

I undid my orange jumpsuit and set it casually next to my bed, not really caring, and then I went ahead and took off my shirt along with it. I lay on my bed wearing nothing but my boxers, and I smiled at the tiniest chill creeping across my bare chest. It was still hot, but at least I had air against my skin, right?

I rested my hands behind my head and closed my eyes yet again. I was so close to falling asleep, I was just barely entering dreamland when I heard the soft swish of the tent flap opening and closing. Someone had come in. I opened one eye and saw Zero standing there, staring at me. I smiled a little at him before closing my eye again and trying to loll back to sleep.

I was half awake, half asleep now. I was still semi-aware that I wasn't asleep, that was how I could tell… For some reason, I felt like my mom was kissing my cheek and saying 'sweet dreams, Stanley'. That was what made me think I was falling asleep, or what let me know, anyway… My mom was back home, not in this horrible place. I was glad for that- mom wouldn't have been able to stand being here, she didn't deserve it either, she was a good woman who just happened to marry a man with a cursed family. The sensation in my head of my mom's soft lipstick coated lips pressing into my cheek made me smile and made my cheek tingle. I missed my mom; I wasn't going to deny that. I missed everything back home. I guess mostly, though, I missed my freedom…


	5. Chapter 5

…**I'm enjoying this story too much…. Okay, so yes, I am adding some AU bits with Zanley, but that's because I love them…! Other than that, I'm trying to go with the story…**

**It's My Fault- Chapter Five.**

"Four days… Four long days and this is all you jackasses have to show for it!" hearing the Warden shout that at us didn't exactly surprise me. We hadn't found anything… I knew we weren't going to, but I knew I had to keep my mouth shut… So I just dug with my eyes down and my mouth shut.

I could see that even Zero was getting tired of this. He had slowed down, not by much, but it was just enough that I noticed- after all, he was almost always right next to me. The Warden told me to go get the wheelbarrow and I did as she said. I pushed it across the bridge of earth and went where she told me to go. It was a mindless task, but I did it anyhow. Anything but digging obsessively like that…

At one point I heard her yelling at someone, but I was gazing at the stone that looked like a head and my thoughts were elsewhere. I came back down to earth when I saw a familiar head of curly hair bouncing along toward another side of the hole. I quickly understood that the Warden was sending Zero to go help the other kids dig, because the D-Tent side had made exceptionally more progress than the other side. I smiled, knowing the boys would soon see that Zero was important in this terrible digging. I heard the Warden spat at Zero that he was going the wrong way and I began pushing the wheelbarrow again.

How it happened, I wasn't sure, but I ended up ramming the wheelbarrow straight into Pendanski and crushing his foot with it. He had shouted angrily at me, but when I looked at some of the other boys, I could see them all grinning at me. I looked at Zero, and Zero was looking at me like I was his hero. I felt so important at that moment, that I didn't care how loudly Pendanski was shouting in my face about how I needed to watch where I was going.

After we went back that night, I was congratulated by several of the boys for getting under Pendanski's skin, and I said that I hadn't actually meant to do it. Armpit had said he didn't care if I meant it, he was just happy I had. I saw that even X-Ray was happy with me and my mom bashing, and I felt like nothing could go wrong.

The next morning, we were told we were going back to individual holes. I was incredibly happy to hear that, but I saw a couple of boys' shoulders fall in annoyance. Probably because they hadn't needed to put in as much effort with other kids helping them. I felt the same way, but at least I knew we wouldn't be aimlessly searching for what wasn't there. Magnet greeted me with a tired 'morning' as we headed out. Zero was in the front of the group again, and I sort of missed having the little guy right by my side like he had been for the past four days.

The digging was awful for me, once again. I knew fully well that I was going to get done last as always and the feeling of accomplishment that settled in my stomach made me feel like I would lose all the contents of my stomach.

At the canteen re-filling, Mr. Sir had said something about water being the most precious whatever on earth and how he was giving me life. He told me to say thank you, and I did. A boom of thunder made everyone's ears perk up and we all hoped and prayed for much needed rain. Mr. Sir made a bad joke about a magical place where it never rained, and each of us groaned in response to it.

Almost immediately after the car began driving off, Magnet called to us and asked if we wanted sunflower seeds. To be honest, I never really cared much for sunflower seeds, so I didn't really make much of a move. Zero didn't say anything either, and I assumed he didn't want any. I noticed that he was watching Mr. Sir's truck. I looked up and followed Zero's gaze and swallowed when I saw the truck turning around and roaring down back towards them. Magnet began shouting about how he was coming back and the next thing I knew Zig Zag threw the bag at me. I think he had done it purposefully, because he knew I wouldn't be able to catch it and it was better to save his own skin than mine.

I tried desperately to hide the seeds and the sack, and Mr. Sir had actually stepped out of his truck before I had even finished. Even before he started moving my way, I knew I was dead. Of course, when he asked me how his bag got there, I tried playing dumb. Didn't work…

He told me to come with him, saying venomously, "Think the warden might like to see what you've found…" I swallowed and I knew I wouldn't be coming back alive. AS I walked, X-Ray smacked my arm and held his open, asking me what I was doing. Magnet only whispered my nickname, but I didn't look at any of them. I suppose I should have said some last words, but I hadn't really thought of it.

Getting into the truck, I exhaled slowly as I felt the engine turn over and we drove towards my inevitable demise.

I hadn't expected Mr. Sir to be the one who was attacked and left bleeding! When she had struck him across the face, I knew right then and there- I wanted nothing to do with girls for the rest of my life. I was sticking with boys from now on…! If it was going to get me attacked by my lover like Mr. Sir, I said no. Forget that!

I had practically sprinted back to the holes, but as I approached, I began slowing down as my heart rate began to slow. I thought about all the wanted Kissin' Kate Barlow posters the Warden had in her office and I wondered why she was so obsessed with the deceased outlaw. The first boy to spot, I think, was Squid. "Hey, look who showed up," was what he had said. Magnet called out my nickname happily and said they thought I was done for.

"Yo, what she do to you?" someone asked, I think it was Armpit.

"Nothin'" I replied honestly.

They repeated me incredulously and someone else asked, "What'd she say?"

"Nothin'" I replied again. They still couldn't believe it. I sighed sorrowfully as I realized I'd be out late tonight digging my hole, probably past midnight.

I stopped my thoughts when I saw my hole. It wasn't how I had left it. It was deep, dark, and…done! I couldn't believe my eyes! Smiling with joy, I grabbed my shovel, chuckling happily, "What is this?" I measured the length of the hole and saw it was completely finished. I wanted to cheer. "Thank you guys!" I said with a happy laugh.

"'Ey, don't look at us," Magnet said. I lifted my head to look at him.

I think it was Squid who added, "Yeah, it was Zero…" I had only paid attention to what he had said, because as soon as he had said it I forgot who it was who was talking. I turned my head to look at Zero. Zero was scowling at whoever was talking; he looked like he hadn't wanted them to say that. I got from my crouching position and slowly walked to Zero's hole. I had seen him glance at me and then try and act like he hadn't, by continuing to dig, but I came to his hole anyway.

I crouched before it before sitting down and saying softly, "Hey…" He stabbed his shovel into the ground and looked at me against the sunlight. "Why'd you dig my hole for me?" I asked calmly, but trying to let how happy I was show through so that he didn't get the idea that I was angry with him.

Zero said softly, "You didn't steal the sunflower seeds…"

I tossed a pebble aside as I responded, "Well, yeah, but neither did you…" I gave him a knowing look with that comment, raising my eyebrows questioningly.

He swallowed and said, "You didn't steal the shoes." I blinked when he said that. Surprise, I'm sure, was evident in my facial expression. I looked at Zero for a moment, thinking on one thing. This act of kindness needed to be repaid. Zero deserved a reward…

I said something I had wanted to say to him for a long while now. "You still wanna learn how t' read?" I asked. Zero had been fidgeting, but he stopped when I asked that. He looked at me and nodded his head, bouncing his brown curls around. I nodded a little and said, "Alright…" I reached out my hand and he quickly clasped it in our agreement. Zero's hands were warm and rough- as I expected all of our hands were by now, calloused with our daily digs and warm with the constant work. Zero smiled at me and I smiled back. It was nice to finally see him smile.

I wasn't sure how much time had gone by at this point, but I was happy to know my conscience was cleared of my horrible guilt. I was sitting on my cot, Zero sitting right beside me, as I tried to begin our first reading _and_ writing lesson. Unsure of what to write first, I decided to go with Zero. Nothing else came to mind.

I wrote the word down, sounding out each letter, and then I couldn't suppress a yawn as I rubbed my eye after. Zero looked at me and smiled. "I can help you dig your hole. So you won't be so tired to teach me," he offered with his gentle smile that I was really starting to like. This wasn't our first lesson, but this was our first time writing. I had taught Zero how to read the alphabet, now he just needed to put it all together into words and he needed to know how to write it out. Zero was always smiling now, it was nice- ever since I agreed to teach him it was like his face was never crinkled with a frown. He was always happy.

"Nah," I said, "I'll be fine…" I thought the offer was incredibly sweet, but I didn't want to use Zero.

"Look, you're a slow digger," Zero said with the tiniest chuckle in his voice.

I had the pencil in my mouth, twirling it between my teeth and I grinned when I heard him say that. "Ooh-hoo…! You're tryin' ta bag on me…!" I said, not hiding that I was laughing a little.

Zero smiled. "Yeah, I'm tryin' ta bag on you," he said.

I smiled back at him and finally agreed to it. Zero then went ahead and started trying to write, copying out what I had written. I sat beside him, leaning forward a little, and I read aloud what he wrote, so he could mentally keep the connection to the images and what they translated to aloud. He seemed shaky, but he wasn't a bad writer. Especially considering that he was just beginning.

I noticed a small mistake on his R, and I quickly corrected him. It wasn't huge, but I wanted Zero to learn perfectly. Even if I was a bad teacher, I wanted to be sure that he knew how to write and write well. He mumbled out a soft 'oh' when I showed him how an R has to look and it made me smile a little.

"This one's easy," I said as he leaned back over the paper. His pencil made the singular curve and I whispered out, "O." I told him he did a good job and then Zero sat back, looking at the paper.

"Y'know, Zero's not my real name," he said, looking at me.

I turned my head to look at him and I asked, "It's not?" I saw him shake his head a little, and I said like an idiot, "But even Pendanski calls you Zero…"

"My name's Hector… Hector Zeroni," he said softly, lifting his chin a bit as he said his full name.

His name seemed so familiar to me, but I just couldn't put my finger on where I knew it. I smiled at him, though, and I repeated softly, "Hector Zeroni…" He nodded once and, as I looked at him and felt a comforting warmth between us, I moved my pencil to my left hand and held out my right, saying gently, "Nice to meet you Hector…"

Zero blinked, but he smiled immediately and took my hand, saying with his wonderfully happy grin, "Nice to meet you…" And then we continued our lesson. Zero wrote every word that I did almost perfectly. He made occasional mistakes, but I was so happy he was doing as well as he was that I hardly corrected any of them- they were the tiniest mistakes anyone could ever make anyway.

As I watched him write, a fatherly feeling came over me- I felt so proud of him. It was strange to admit, but I knew I was definitely proud. I slowly reached out my hand and placed it upon his head of curls and rubbed the top of it gently, ruffling those curls and causing Zero to inhale and look at me in surprise. I smiled down at him and watched as his cheeks darkened. Zero turned back to the paper, but I could see him occasionally stealing a glance at me every now and then.

We dug together for the next few days- Zero helping me so that we'd get done together and I'd have enough energy to teach him when we got back to camp. None of the other kids seemed too happy that Zero was helping me, but I ignored them. They made cracks about slavery, but I tried not to let it get to me, and I hoped Zero didn't let it get to him either.

"So that's twenty six letters… So we can do five letters for four days and then six letters on the fifth day…" he said while we dug one day.

I stopped to look at him and I said, actually impressed, "That's good math…"

Zero scoffed. "I'm not stupid," he said, "I know everyone thinks I am, I just don't like answering stupid questions." Couldn't exactly blame him- I wouldn't either… And then X-Ray and Squid just had to come over and make a fuss about how it must be easy with my own personal slave. I saw Zero shake his head when they came over to the hole out of the corner of my eye, but neither one of us said anything to them.

After digging, I told Zero I was going to go get some more water and then I'd meet him in the tent to keep teaching him. The little guy agreed without a fuss and I went to the water spigot and began re-filling my canteen.

Boys mocked me when I was there, still teasing me about my slave, but I didn't care anymore. I knew I was helping Zero and that was all that mattered. Zero learning to read was worth all the trouble. I went into the tent and began writing with him. He had gotten to mom when I noticed his mind was somewhere else. He stared off into nothingness and slowly he began to speak.

"We weren't always homeless… I remember we used to live in a lot of different places," I watched as he told me of his childhood. "…And then… We didn't live anywhere…"

"It must've been hard," I whispered, genuinely meaning what I said.

He looked at me for a split second before continuing, "Yeah. My mom had problems, but she would try so hard to make a better life for us… She always used to say 'I love you more than air'…" He sighed after saying that, then he continued, "She couldn't take me everywhere she went… I used to have to wait on a-uh porch or a-uh playground… Then one day she didn't come back…"

I felt so much sympathy for Zero. He had such a horrible life- he didn't deserve it; he was such a good kid… "What happened to her?" I asked softly.

He sighed in exasperation, "I dunno… That's what bothers me the most… If I could, I would hire a whole team of private investigators just to find her. Or to find out what happened to her…" I swallowed and my eyes scanned his face, pity washing over me, while at the same time I felt a strong feeling of happiness- Zero was so dedicated and so loyal. He loved his mom and it was obvious. I would have been overjoyed if Zero were my son- he wouldn't ever be able to upset me…

After that I felt like a complete and total goober because when he told me he stayed in Laney Park I had gotten all happy and said I used to go there all the time. "I used to sleep in the tunnel, next to the swinging bridge," he said. My face had fallen faster than a boulder to the bottom of the ocean. Zero… I wanted to hug him and make all that pain go away. "But no biggie," he said softly. I looked at him and goose bumps invaded my skin as I pictured poor little Zero in a tunnel, cold, hungry, and alone.

I blinked after that vision… Wait a minute… Alone… Hungry… Hungry… and Lonely… I looked at the back of Zero's head as head continued writing, my eyes widening with a sudden realization. Zero was the wolf from not just my dream, but the actual song…!

"Oh my God," I whispered to myself in utter disbelief. Zero stopped and looked back at me, I saw his cheeks darken when he saw me staring at him, but I couldn't look away. Zero was part of my destiny, I knew it… There was something that happened, or would happen, that had to happen and it involved him, I just knew it…! He smiled a tiny bit up at me and I whispered, "Zero…"

He didn't seem to understand why I was suddenly acting so funny. All I could think about was him, even when he was right beside me. It was Zero, it had to be. Something with Zero… I didn't know what yet, or if it had already happened, all I knew was my fate was locked with Zero.


End file.
